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Chaco
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (0)  
Probably not. I've heard this one and its sequel in (where else?) Global History class, of all places.

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[Last edited by Chaco at 11-03-2006 12:30 AM]
11-03-2006 at 12:30 AM
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Pneh
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (0)  
Why wasn't the ghost at the ball?

He didn't have anybody to go with.

Hahaha... :?

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11-03-2006 at 07:23 AM
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tokyokid
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3 Chinese (Bob, Randy, Joe) men were visitng America, to try and learn English.

Bob walks into an audition and hears "For 50 cents! For 50 cents!"

Randy goes to a grocery store and hears: "I'm next in line! I'm next in line!"

Joe goes to a sports game and hears: "Yes! Yes!"

Then they are walking down the street, and they pass a dead guy in a trash can. A police man walks up to them and asks "Did you kill this man?" Joes says: "Yes! Yes!"

Then the cop said, "What did you do it for?" Randy says: "For 50 cents! For 50 cents!"
The Cop says: "You guys will go to court and you may get the death penalty!" Then Bob says, "I'm next in line, I'm next in line!"

I've always thought that was hilarious. :)
11-03-2006 at 09:31 PM
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NiroZ
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (+1)  
tokyokid wrote:
3 Hittites (Bob, Randy, Joe) men were visitng America, to try and learn English.

Bob walks into an audition and hears "For 50 cents! For 50 cents!"

Randy goes to a grocery store and hears: "I'm next in line! I'm next in line!"

Joe goes to a sports game and hears: "Yes! Yes!"

Then they are walking down the street, and they pass a dead guy in a trash can. A police man walks up to them and asks "Did you kill this man?" Joes says: "Yes! Yes!"

Then the cop said, "What did you do it for?" Randy says: "For 50 cents! For 50 cents!"
The Cop says: "You guys will go to court and you may get the death penalty!" Then Bob says, "I'm next in line, I'm next in line!"

I've always thought that was hilarious. :)

fixed.

[Last edited by NiroZ at 11-04-2006 01:13 AM]
11-04-2006 at 01:00 AM
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Pinnacle
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (0)  
Hitties?
edit: oh, you fixed it.


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[Last edited by Pinnacle at 11-04-2006 01:18 AM]
11-04-2006 at 01:04 AM
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NiroZ
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (0)  
Pinnacle wrote:
Hitties?
That was, ummmm... all part of the joke :D
11-04-2006 at 01:13 AM
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Ostegolectr1c
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (-1)  
So a grandma and her grandchild were at the beach.

The boy got bored and asked:

Click here to view the secret text


The grandma, a very kind person answered:

Click here to view the secret text


One of the worst and yet the most funny joke I've ever heard.
Hope I didn't offend anyone.

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11-07-2006 at 10:02 PM
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NiroZ
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (0)  
ah, I'm not sure that is appropriate on these forums. Using secret tags doesn't fix it.
11-07-2006 at 10:42 PM
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Kevin_P86
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (0)  
link ?

Yes, I know, I know... :)

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11-07-2006 at 10:48 PM
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Briareos
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (+1)  
Ostegolectr1c wrote:
So a grandma and her grandchild were at the beach.

The boy got bored and asked:

Click here to view the secret text


The grandma, a very kind person answered:

Click here to view the secret text
There - fixed it and made it forum compliant... :P

np: Underworld - Pizza For Eggs (RiverRun Project)

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11-07-2006 at 10:59 PM
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agaricus5
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Kevin_P86 wrote:
link ?

Yes, I know, I know... :)
Even with the proposed tags, however, that won't really fix the post in any way. I personally don't find it funny (unless there's a double meaning I'm missing), and I don't think we should be encouraging people (especially children) to think that kind of thing is generally meant to be amusing anyway.

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11-07-2006 at 10:59 PM
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Kevin_P86
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agaricus5 wrote:
Kevin_P86 wrote:
link ?

Yes, I know, I know... :)
Even with the proposed tags, however, that won't really fix the post in any way. I personally don't find it funny (unless there's a double meaning I'm missing), and I don't think we should be encouraging people (especially children) to think that kind of thing is generally meant to be amusing anyway.
I am aware of this. That was the reason for adding "Yes, I know, I know... :)".

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11-07-2006 at 11:07 PM
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Blondbeard
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agaricus5 wrote:
Even with the proposed tags, however, that won't really fix the post in any way. I personally don't find it funny (unless there's a double meaning I'm missing), and I don't think we should be encouraging people (especially children) to think that kind of thing is generally meant to be amusing anyway.

No, what we are obviously supposed to encourage people (especially children) to find amusing is killing things with a really big sword. I mean, come on! I think it's a lot more alarming that children are supposed to be amused by things getting killed.

I might add though that I don't see what's funny with this joke.
11-07-2006 at 11:13 PM
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agaricus5
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Blondbeard wrote:
agaricus5 wrote:
Even with the proposed tags, however, that won't really fix the post in any way. I personally don't find it funny (unless there's a double meaning I'm missing), and I don't think we should be encouraging people (especially children) to think that kind of thing is generally meant to be amusing anyway.

No, what we are obviously supposed to encourage people (especially children) to find amusing is killing things with a really big sword. I mean, come on! I think it's a lot more alarming that children are supposed to be amused by things getting killed.
Are you comparing the joke's content to DROD's storyline? In that case, I think you're quite mistaken; DROD's slaying is on a very different level to that joke.

The killing with a big sword here is directed at imaginary monsters and creatures, and because of this, it's not really applicable to real-life people or animals, since there aren't any people or real animals in DROD that are being made examples of by being killed intentionally (the Slayer and Guards do try to kill Beethro, but they are portrayed as monsters too). The joke, on the other hand directly involves a person-person interaction, which can be translated into a normal life situation, and which I would imagine is not what most people would appreciate happening in real life.

Although you could argue that a minority of people do get obsessed by computer game violence, this is most probably the exception, and most people can distinguish between obviously imaginary and real-life violence, so your comparison is highly flawed. Anyway, DROD's major focus is not the killing; it's hardly realistic and not the point of the game at all, so I would think that its effect on encouraging violence in people is going to be minimal compared to games containing more realistic violence.

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[Last edited by agaricus5 at 11-07-2006 11:32 PM]
11-07-2006 at 11:31 PM
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stigant
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Although you could argue that a minority of people do get obsessed by computer game violence, this is most probably the exception, and most people can distinguish between obviously imaginary and real-life violence, so your comparison is highly flawed. Anyway, DROD's major focus is not the killing; it's hardly realistic and not the point of the game at all, so I would think that its effect on encouraging violence in people is going to be minimal compared to games containing more realistic violence.

While the joke in question is arguably closer to reality than DROD, one could certainly make this same point (ie reasonable people are capable of drawing a distinction between the joke and reality) about the joke.

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11-07-2006 at 11:37 PM
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Ezlo
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Here's my two cents:

Click here to view the secret text

11-07-2006 at 11:43 PM
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tokyokid
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icon Re: The best/worst joke you ever heard (+1)  
It's Jeff_Ray all over again! :no
And the joke wasn't even funny. But I suppose this topic is for the Best/Worst joke you ever heard, not the most profane joke you've ever heard.

[Last edited by tokyokid at 11-07-2006 11:51 PM]
11-07-2006 at 11:48 PM
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agaricus5
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stigant wrote:
Although you could argue that a minority of people do get obsessed by computer game violence, this is most probably the exception, and most people can distinguish between obviously imaginary and real-life violence, so your comparison is highly flawed. Anyway, DROD's major focus is not the killing; it's hardly realistic and not the point of the game at all, so I would think that its effect on encouraging violence in people is going to be minimal compared to games containing more realistic violence.
While the joke in question is arguably closer to reality than DROD, one could certainly make this same point (ie reasonable people are capable of drawing a distinction between the joke and reality) about the joke.
I agree with you, but this highlights the point that the margin of unreasonability should therefore be higher, given that it is arguably more applicable to a real life situation (i.e. is a dungeon infested with monsters more realistic than that joke's situation?). Also, what makes it distinct from DROD is that the situation involves an interaction between two people that is undesirable, while DROD involves a situation (in theory undesirable) between a person and some monsters. The difference here is that finding that aspect of DROD amusing is finding monster killing amusing (monsters don't exist), while finding that joke amusing implies finding that general interaction funny (people do exist, however).

Perhaps I've helped to push this a bit too far off-topic, but at least the problem was only minor and hadn't sparked off any flame wars or anything similar.

So, just to change the mood a bit and get us back into a joking frame of mind, here's one awful Anatomy joke that my friend made up.

Person 1: "This skeleton's missing a humerus."
Person 2: "That's not funny."

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11-08-2006 at 12:05 AM
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Jatopian
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What do number pirates seek?
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Explanation:
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I came up with this one while bored in class.

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11-08-2006 at 01:12 AM
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RoboBob3000
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At my high school, our mascot was the pirates. At football games, some of us would cheer:

"Gimme an R!"

"Arr!"

"Gimme an R!"

"Arr!"

"Gimme an R!"

"Arr!"

"What's that spell?"

*pause*

"Arr!"

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11-08-2006 at 04:17 AM
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Timo006
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A joke I saw not so long ago.

You don't have to be mad to work here,
Click here to view the secret text


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[Last edited by Timo006 at 11-08-2006 12:04 PM]
11-08-2006 at 12:04 PM
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Znirk
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What's a pirate's favourite letter?
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11-08-2006 at 01:12 PM
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Jason
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Edited Stuff was here. Sorry! :blush

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[Last edited by Jason at 11-09-2006 08:05 AM]
11-08-2006 at 05:54 PM
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zex20913
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Those last two were hilarious, guys. Don't let the down-modders spoil the fun.

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11-08-2006 at 06:50 PM
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Jason
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Jason wrote:
I know how to make a cat bark!

Click here to view the secret text

Umm.. Can someone tell me the problem with my joke?

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11-08-2006 at 07:07 PM
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Doom
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Because hurting animals for no purpose is generally frowned upon, I'd suppose. I found it rather bad taste, too, even though I didn't mod those posts.

Still, I must say that reading them in a not-so-serious way makes them sound so stupid it's kind of funny.
11-08-2006 at 07:17 PM
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Maurog
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I think the "Worst joke" part is ruining this topic. As jokes get worse they sink into a territory involving people's parents, babies who are not (technically speaking) alive, Hittites, and other things not suitable for general public. There are people around who are 10 years old... I wouldn't want to hear the last two jokes from a 10 year old that learned it from an internet site, that's downright creepy!

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11-08-2006 at 07:56 PM
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Schik
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Jason wrote:
Umm.. Can someone tell me the problem with my joke?
Doom already covered this question, but I'll throw my 2 cents in here anyways. Here, look at this wikipedia article on sociopathy. It shows three potential warning signs for sociopathy:
* a longer-than-usual period of bedwetting
* cruelty to animals
* pyromania
Your "joke" contains 2 of the three warning signs. I'm not saying you're a sociopath, I'm just saying that maybe a lot of people don't find that very funny. I do a lot of work with my local animal shelter. I've actually seen video of some local kids dousing an animal (not a cat) with gas and lighting it on fire. It wasn't cute, funny, or remotely amusing.

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11-08-2006 at 10:33 PM
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Briareos
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Schik wrote:
Your "joke" contains 2 of the three warning signs.
Also, it contains a :blowup smily - that'll tick off Maurog a lot as he's still on his anti-:blowup crusade... :lol

np: Underworld - I'm A Big Sister, And I'm A Girl, And I'm A Princess, And This Is My Horse (RiverRun Project)

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11-08-2006 at 11:13 PM
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trick
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Well, I for one have to admit I chuckled at the jokes. Now, I'm pretty sure I'm not a sociopath, and I don't enjoy watching puppies burn*. In fact, I'm very firmly against cruelty to animals of any kind. The joke was funny because, well, it's just an absurd over-the-top way of getting a pointless result, with dire consequences. But then, my sense of humor can be a dark place sometimes.

If that joke had been a description of something that actually happened, I wouldn't have thought it funny at all.

~ Gerry

* At least not without ketchup.
11-09-2006 at 01:31 AM
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