First, grammar:
Click here to view the secret text
×i should be I whenever use to refer to yourself.
Therefore,
Beethro: Hmm...what is this place?? And...how can i be here?
Beethro: I'am only remember.......nothing! I don't know anything about my previous life!
Beethro: I'am only rememberI only know to i'am a good swordman...and i like to kill...ye!
Should be corrected to say:
Beethro: Hmm...what is this place?? And...how can I be here?
Beethro: I can only remember.......nothing! I don't know anything about my previous life!
Beethro: I can only remember I only know that I am a good swordsman...and I like to kill...ye!
I realize that English may not be your first language, and I'm not trying to mock you, but It just helps people to like your hold more if the writing is easy to understand. If you would like, I could help you fix more of your grammatical errors.
Do the same sort of thing with the scroll in the secret room, and always check to make sure it all fits on one scroll (look to the left).
The Vault:
3N: Good, easy puzzle.
2N 1E: Not bad, but if you make the passageways 1 space wide, it gets harder.
1N 2W: Most people don't like easy horde rooms. I happen to be one of them. Try to stay away from this type of room, if at all possible.
2W: Same thing here.
Good level. I like the architecture, but there are a lot of secret rooms. I don't know about anyone else, but I don't like it when people make a twisty path in front. It's just annoying.
The Defense System:
1E: Try to remember to make most characters invincible.
2N 1E: I can kill 4 guards before they turn into monsters. You should fix this. Also, I can kill the front guard before he speaks. This is a problem, so use the wait for player command.
4N 1E, 4N, 5N, 5N 1E, 3N 2E, 2N 2E: If you want to make guard fights harder, use a more wide open space. In all of these rooms, I just stood in one spot to kill all of the guards.
If you tweak the difficulty in some of these rooms, I can imagine this being a much better level.
The sewers:
3E: You caught me on this one. Good trick.
1S 3E: I like this room. It's fun to play.
1S 2E: This is a great room. It has a much harder puzzle.
1N 9E: Normally, architects don't force players to find secret wall. However, it fits in well with your story, and I wouldn't ask you to remove it.
This level is much better than your previous levels. Good job.
Palace Cellars:
4N 1E: Missing a red door.
4N: Extremely annoying, but if you had less wide spaces on the left, it would be much nicer, not to mention harder.
That's all for now. More later.