Schik
Level: Legendary Smitemaster
Rank Points: 5419
Registered: 02-04-2003
IP: Logged
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Re: Who zeroed Erik's rank points? (+10)
Okay, this is getting out of hand - it's time to fess up.
I was working on the 8088 Erik lets me use in his basement when I heard a quiet whimper from the next room. I peeked out, only to see Erik clutching DROD.net under his arm, a strange sneer on his face. Erik often does odd things like that without any explanation, but my curiosity was piqued, so I followed him.
He hopped on his bike, so I grabbed my Segway and tailed him. Crazy fool starting riding down the middle of the highway! I swerved out into the road behind him, trying to steer traffic away from my precious DROD.net - oh yeah, and Erik. Worried, I pulled out my cell phone and warned the police that there was a madman riding a bike on the highway. They promptly showed up and pulled him over. "Whew", I thought, "that's over. He'll take my baby home now and plug her back in."
But noooooo. I stood there, mouth open in disbelief, as he dragged his bike over to the train tracks. Then it hit me! Erik has seen my rank points closing in on his, and he was going to take DROD.net out to a secluded area and "accidentally" lose some of my rank points!
Erik and DROD.net rode along the tracks for a while, and then I saw a train approaching them from behind. It was getting dangerously close, and Erik hadn't seemed to have noticed. I yelled out "Woooooo wooooooo!", and Erik finally turned around and saw the train. He seemed to slightly speed up, as if he actually believed he could outrun a train on a bike. Ha! It didn't take too long for him to give up and hop off the tracks.
As the train passed Erik, the weirdest thing happened: I could swear I heard him humming.... the theme to... Gunsmoke? Erik seemed entranced by the big shiny objects passing by him so quickly, and he started drifting closer and closer to the train.
I really didn't want to see a bloody end to this adventure, so I yelled "ERIK!!!" He swerved when he heard his name, and somehow got his bicycle entangled in the railing of the last car in the train. His bike bounced around for a while, all the while with Erik yelling "Wheeeeee!". How he held on, I'll never know. With one last big bump, the bike flew up in the air, and miraculously landed on the right rail. Erik grabbed the back of the train and was crusing along, hitching a free ride.
In all the excitement, I forgot the most important thing: Erik was out to sabotage my rank points. I started devising a plan on my PDA. After a minute I looked up, and I was suddenly seeing double - there were two bikes on the tracks now. I rubbed my eyes and looked again, but there will still two of them. They started doing some pretty nifty tricks, and I was again distracted from the real purpose of this trip. Then the train started speeding up. I had to stop Erik before he could carry out his evil plan - good thing I had disabled the speed limiter on my Segway!
The second bike rode up on top of Erik, spun for a while, then came back down. I had to act quickly. My PDA didn't have enough processing power to perform the calculations I needed, but luckily it had wireless networking built in! I entered a simulation of the train, the two bikes, and DROD.net itself into the PDA, transferred it to DROD.net wirelessly, and ran some different scenarios. DROD.net quickly came up with an optimal solution to my little problem. As the second bike rider started riding up on top of Erik, I leaned down and scooped up a rock. I double checked the location the PDA was giving me, and threw the rock with incredible precision. Bang! The second rider came crashing down on Erik, who dropped DROD.net. Thanks to DROD.net's speedy calculations, not only did Erik's plan not work, it backfired! He lost his own points instead of mine!
Take that, Erik. Take THAT.
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The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way it treats its animals.
--Mahatma Gandhi
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