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stigant
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icon Memorable quotes of the Eighth (+3)  
"Like my mother always said: 'a wraithwing in tar is worth twenty two on a trapdoor'" muttered Beethro as he chased the last bat into a sticky cave and regained his balance on the lip of the newly created chasm. "Mother always did know best. I wish I had written down more of the things she told me before I left home."

Suddenly the room got noticebly colder and Beethro felt great gobs of goose pimples galloping down his spine. Spinning around with dread, he was met with something he hadn't seen since... Wait that looks like... oh no!

"You wish you had written down ANYTHING I said before you left! Or learned to read and write for that matter!" It was his mother. Or a reasonable facsimile thereof. Not that Beethro knew what a facsimile was. Or the proper usage of thereof. She was a bit taller than he remembered. She had taken on a bit of a greenish sheen since he last saw her. And she had learned how to levitate. But there was no mistaking that wart on her nose (the one that he had helped her comb every morning until he was 16) or the wiry grey hair pulled into a bun so tightly it stretched the wrinkles on her face sideways and drew her beady eyes into tiny little slits.

"I need to get out of this dungeon air.... I'm starting to hallucinate again."

"You're not hallucinating, you dolt. Now stand up straight! Clean off that sword! Buckle up your sandles... You'd think I didn't teach you nuthin about being presentable: Remember, in a dungeon cleanliness is next to getting paid."

"Don't you mean 'I didn't teach you anything. And you were talking about clean rooms, not clean clothes."

"Don't you sass me, boy, and another thing..."

Two hours later, after finally figuring out why she looked taller (she was hovering 6 inches off the floor!) and working out a theory of tar invariance, Beethro finally managed to work a word in edgewise.

"Look mom, its been right lovely seeing you again, but I've got to finish up this dungeon. I promise, as soon as I get out of here, I'll run right over to the adult literacy program at the local community college and write down all the stuff you ever said to me. I promise..."

"Alright deary, you always were so buried in your work. Don't forget to eat your vegetables."

And so Beethro set off, leaving the ghostly apparition of his mother behind (he didn't think Dugan would mind too much if he left just one little pesky ghost in the dungeon - afterall, what could she do? Nag the guards to death?). After he left the dungeon, he found the first scribe he could lay his hands on, and dictated all of his mother's sayings for posterity.

Ok, so the idea here is to come up with witty pieces of advice for fellow smitemasters and other denizens of the Eighth.

Well, get to it!

[Edited by stigant at Local Time:01-25-2005 at 08:40 PM]

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01-25-2005 at 08:36 PM
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silver
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icon Re: Memorable quotes of the Eighth (+1)  
I don't get it. Beethro is supposed to have a master intellect and people(*) keep writing things implying he's somehow stupid.

(*) other than Erik, who writes as if B is terribly intelligent.

[Edited by silver at Local Time:01-25-2005 at 11:33 PM]

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01-25-2005 at 11:30 PM
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RoboBob3000
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icon Re: Memorable quotes of the Eighth (0)  
"Don't count your roach eggs before they've spawned!"

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01-26-2005 at 12:11 AM
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rowrow
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" Don't think you succeded when you see an empty blue floor."

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01-26-2005 at 01:09 AM
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stigant
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icon Re: Memorable quotes of the Eighth (0)  
quote:
silver wrote:
I don't get it. Beethro is supposed to have a master intellect and people(*) keep writing things implying he's somehow stupid.

(*) other than Erik, who writes as if B is terribly intelligent.




That's a good point, but nothing Beethro does with his intellect actually requires reading (except for scrolls, I suppose) just killing efficiently.

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01-26-2005 at 01:47 AM
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Oneiromancer
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icon Re: Memorable quotes of the Eighth (0)  
Maybe people see him like they see Roger Wilco (from Space Quest)...Roger is utterly stupid, but since the person controlling him is smart (or has a hint book), he is able to solve really tough puzzles. If you play the game such that it is you helping Beethro, then obviously Beethro's stupid and it's only because of you that he makes it to the end. There are other ways to interpret it where it's Beethro doing all the work, which would make him extremely smart since he never dies and lives to tell those kids about it all at the end.

Game on,

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01-26-2005 at 01:52 AM
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ErikH2000
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Beethro isn't stupid. He's very clever actually--just in a blue-collar, self-taught sort of way. He's one of those guys that knows a little bit about everything and has strong opinions. Occasionally, he does some dumb things.

-Erik

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01-26-2005 at 02:44 AM
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rowrow
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quote:
ErikH2000 wrote:
Beethro isn't stupid. He's very clever actually--just in a blue-collar, self-taught sort of way. He's one of those guys that knows a little bit about everything and has strong opinions. Occasionally, he does some dumb things.
-Erik

Like? Um for forgetting to polish his sword, or sharpen his sword, or not asking for more money for exterminating a dungeon, or not buying car insurance?

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01-26-2005 at 02:53 AM
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ErikH2000
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quote:
rowrow wrote:
Like? Um for forgetting to polish his sword, or sharpen his sword, or not asking for more money for exterminating a dungeon, or not buying car insurance?

Beethro would remember to do all the things related to his job, i.e. sharpening his sword. He would make mistakes in other areas of his life. He's not very good as a political creature, dealing with the king or his fellow smitemasters. He doesn't consider that it's inappropriate to take his young nephew to a brothel. He says things without thinking about their consequences.

-Erik

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01-26-2005 at 03:06 AM
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silver
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icon Re: Memorable quotes of the Eighth (0)  
but we know he's literate because he reads signs, letters, notes, scrolls in the game in the three official chapters of his story :) I think he writes a note in one, too, I forget. I know for sure he made detailed maps of the dungeon with dimensions noted, and it was good enough to impress an architect, so I'm pretty sure he can draw and write well enough :).

but, yah, he's like the stereotypical mad scientist. brilliant at what he does, but a little scatterbrained in other aspects of his life.


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01-26-2005 at 04:25 AM
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The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.
08-15-2016 at 06:03 PM
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enzi666
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Could it be that we got the dumb brute stereotype from the intro texts in KDD?
He didn't seem overly clever there. In Level9 he tries to solve a water puzzle with some bottles and fails, leaving it up to the player.

In JtRH he started to talk and my perception of his intelligence completely changed. In retrospect one of the best decisions because it got way more interesting.

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08-18-2016 at 03:57 PM
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ErikH2000
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quote:
enzi666 wrote:
In JtRH he started to talk and my perception of his intelligence completely changed. In retrospect one of the best decisions because it got way more interesting.

It's bugged me for a while that Beethro's dialogue style throughout the game was inconsistent. In JtRH, he was rough and folksy. And it gave way to him speaking more cleverly later. But he was always meant to be a smart guy--just unpolished in his presentation. The story at least explains that he took some time to educate himself. So I guess it's a little like some Appalachian yokel going to Harvard.

-Erik

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09-05-2016 at 12:38 AM
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icon Re: Memorable quotes of the Eighth (+1)  
quote:
ErikH2000 wrote:
quote:
enzi666 wrote:
In JtRH he started to talk and my perception of his intelligence completely changed. In retrospect one of the best decisions because it got way more interesting.

It's bugged me for a while that Beethro's dialogue style throughout the game was inconsistent. In JtRH, he was rough and folksy. And it gave way to him speaking more cleverly later. But he was always meant to be a smart guy--just unpolished in his presentation. The story at least explains that he took some time to educate himself. So I guess it's a little like some Appalachian yokel going to Harvard.

-Erik


That, and in GatEB, he's a good storyteller, but only really recalls the basics of what happened. Stuff like if Gunthro left a squadmate puzzle of if a Squadmate left it is shrugged off, and don't get me started on the shallow water.

Beethro should really get checked out for his mental health. There aught to be some sorta help in the Eighth for that stuff.

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10-02-2016 at 04:32 AM
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...anyhow, a bump because I got a good quote:

"A thousand of my hearts die individual deaths each moment I speak to you."

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04-06-2017 at 06:29 PM
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Fix-It Fixen
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I always thought of Beethro as wise and witty, rather than some sort of genius. He has experience and he takes his job seriously. He's not exactly a mathematician or an engineer, but he knows how to think like a dungeon architect and how to survive in any given dungeon or hold. Very much a blue-collar wiseman.

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04-14-2017 at 11:48 AM
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