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mrimer
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> take off rubber bands

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03-14-2005 at 07:23 AM
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Arkarian
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Your rubber bands have molded to your fingers, and become part of you.
>itch rubber bands
aaaaaaaah
>take ye flask
You see a random flask being carried by the ants. You cannot take ye flask
>why cannot I take ye flask?
because ye flask is attached to ye ant, which is attached to ye ground, which is attached to ye forum.
>Take ye forum
A Policeman wanders up and bashes you for trying to steal this forum. You are now unconcious.
Time to conciousnousnous: 3 YEARS 6 DAYS 12 HOURS 45MINS 1 SECOND

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03-14-2005 at 09:50 AM
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Maurog
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> have flashback

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03-14-2005 at 11:52 AM
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egg egg
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You remember the start of the game, where you are up the tree, and everything that has happened since. What a waste of a flashback. You havent even remembered any ancient knowlage!

>WAKE UP
03-14-2005 at 03:24 PM
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agaricus5
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You suddenly regain consciousness, although you ask yourself why you hadn't thought of it sooner. The army ants continue to walk into the cave, causing considerable discomfort to the monsters within it.

>Command ants to halt.

You shout to the ants to halt. Immediately, all of them stop, so it looks like they had some pretty good army training.

>Order ants to enlarge channel.

The ants do so, scooping out the channel with their powerful jaws and piling the dirt on either side. After a few minutes, they form a deep channel leading to the cave. The sand, however, does not flow; the problem is that it is not sloping, so the sand cannot flow down to the cave.

>Order ants to weaken cave ceiling.

You order the ants to carry out the operation, and so they begin to scoop cracks and small fissures out of the cave ceiling.

>Stomp on ceiling.

You wait until you deem the ceiling of the cave weak and crumbly enough, then you call to the ants to retreat out of the way, which they do promptly. You then stomp with all your might on the ceiling.

It collapses with a great rumble, creating a gaping hole in the cavern's side, and causing the sand to spill into it at an alarming rate. The monsters quickly move out of the way of the sand, but you fall directly downwards and land at the bottom with the sand pouring over you. You estimate you have 5-6 seconds until you are totally inundated with the sand.

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03-15-2005 at 12:06 AM
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schep
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>PACK SAND

You quickly stomp the sand around your legs into a flat spot thick enough for you to stand on. But the sand pouring down from above is coming faster than you can stomp.

You hear a bleating sound nearby, and strain to make out the form of a sheep monster through the sandstorm. It's hard to see, but it looks as though the monster is resting comfortably on top of the sand and rising with it.

>GRAB SHEEP

The sheep monster is just out of your reach, and you cannot move through the sand.

>REACH TO SHEEP WITH BRANCH

03-15-2005 at 02:03 AM
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egg egg
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The sheep monster starts to lazily eat the branch.

>Dig out with corkscrew and antlers
03-15-2005 at 07:42 AM
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Arkarian
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After some serious corkscrewing, you just dig your way out of the sandy hole. The antlers somehow become fixed to your head. Strange. All the monster sheep disappear except one, who hangs his underwear to dry on your antlers.

You gain: one smelly monster sheep underpants.

There are 3957834 exits visible, but only one exit you can actually use.

>look other exits
You canot use these exits, as you lack the neccessary opposible slimey tentacles of Zaaaaaarb.

>take the high road
After considerable climbing, you reach the high road.
There is hairy lemming of doom here!
COMBAT ROUND!!

you hit the lemming with your sorrowful butterknife (of lengend)
you do twelvety damage
the lemming growls. you now need new pants.

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03-15-2005 at 04:14 PM
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wackhead_uk
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>use smelly monster underwear

You now do not need new pants, but you preferred you old one to these. 

>Say boo

The lemming is mortally terrified by a monster with antlers and a trunk shouting 
at it. *Critical Hit!* You do eleventeen damage.


[Edited by wackhead_uk at Local Time:03-15-2005 at 04:28 PM]
03-15-2005 at 04:28 PM
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egg egg
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The lemming faints.

It leaves behind 240 ISK, half a phoenix down, and a level up mushroom.

(can anyone say what these items are from?)
03-15-2005 at 07:24 PM
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Fried Chips
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ISK would be EVE Online (or just Icelandic currency). The phoenix down is final fantasy (and apparently also a band of some sort), and the mushroom is from Mario, I guess.

> Collect loot

You now have the lemmings loot.

[Edited by Fried Chips at Local Time:03-16-2005 at 12:51 PM]

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03-16-2005 at 12:49 PM
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LeForce
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> Take off every 'ZIG'

You are now in outer space, CATS appears on your spaceship.

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03-17-2005 at 10:59 PM
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wackhead_uk
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>What you say?

CATS say "All you base are belong to us". You don't know why cats are speaking, but you can 
dig it. :)

>Use Tyrant-divining rod


[Edited by wackhead_uk at Local Time:03-19-2005 at 12:14 PM]
03-19-2005 at 12:14 PM
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LeForce
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Tyrant-divining rod only works on humans

> Main Screen Turn On

This is an adventure game not a recital of All your base.

> Kill CATS

With What?

> Fists!

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03-19-2005 at 12:34 PM
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Abbyzzmal
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You engage in a fistfight with the CATS. You land more punches, but unfortunately, every time the CATS get a jab in, you lose a pint of blood. When you pass out, the CATS take pity on you and stop fighting, and while you are asleep, they curl at your feet, more like KITTENS than horrible space bandits.

>Awwwwww!
03-19-2005 at 03:19 PM
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RoboBob3000
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>drop herring

The herring, covered in strawberry yogurt, is a pinkish-red. You deem the pinkish-red herring useless and discard it. The KITTENS appreciate all your herring, but give you nothing in return, as the herring was inherently worthless.



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03-20-2005 at 03:54 PM
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trick
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> ceremoniously accept nothing

You hold a little acceptance speech, and proceed to add the nothing to your satchel. It fits in perfectly, almost as if it weren't there at all.

> scratch KITTENS behind EARS
03-25-2005 at 10:43 PM
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agaricus5
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You go up to the EARS (Egoistical Alternate-Realm Servant), but find no KITTENS behind him. Behind you, the KITTENS look slightly upset that you left them and walked away, although they begin to go to sleep after a short time.

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03-25-2005 at 11:24 PM
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Krishh
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>don't wait
03-26-2005 at 03:51 PM
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Rabscuttle
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Time doesn't pass.

>xyzzy
03-27-2005 at 02:13 AM
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Hix
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A hollow voice says "Fool"
03-28-2005 at 01:05 AM
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trick
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> grab hollow voice
03-29-2005 at 04:57 PM
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Maurog
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You grab at the hollow voice as hard as you can. The hollow voice twists and turns and struggles with all its might, but you don't let go. Desperate, the voice becomes higher and higher, until finally becoming ultra-sound and slipping right through your hands! The ultra-high pitched sound makes you feel dizzy and reverberates in your teeth.

Suddendly your teeth crack and shatter!
You hear shattering sounds from your inventory!
You hear shattering sounds from the direction of KITTENS!

> look in satchel.

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03-29-2005 at 06:16 PM
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RoboBob3000
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You see the inside of your sachel.

>revive thread

You attempt to revive the thread, but you fail. If only you had an amulet of thread restoration.

Moderators delete your post and ban you from the board.

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04-21-2005 at 04:01 AM
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trick
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> delete previous post and ban RoboBob3000 from the board

You consider doing this for a moment. After toying with the idea for a little while, you come to the conclusion that it is indeed possible to take a joke too far. RoboBob3000 is safe, for now.

Suddenly, an amulet of thread restoration appears out of nowhere. It smells faintly of cherry pie.

> eat amulet of thread restoration

[Edited by trick at Local Time:04-21-2005 at 03:24 PM]
04-21-2005 at 03:22 PM
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wackhead_uk
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Thread is restored with renewed vigor!

>Walk around for a bit

You walk around for a bit, and see a thing which would be great for a new tangent of this crazy story. You also feel a rumbling in your stomach.

>look thing

[Edited by wackhead_uk at Local Time:04-21-2005 at 04:23 PM]
04-21-2005 at 04:22 PM
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stigant
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Off game: I have to say that I was enjoying this game until it devolved into silliness and we just made up ways to get out of a situation without thinking about what we already had on hand. For example, when we were stuck in the cave with the sheep monsters, trying to get out through the hole in the roof, we had Golden Scissors and were dealing with itchy sheep monsters. It took a page of people suggesting crazy deus-ex-machina solutions before somebody decided to shear the sheep. Even then, nobody thought to use the wool to create a rope to get everybody out of the hole. Instead, we dug a trench or something and then there were ants and it was silly. Its good to think outside the box - that shows lateral intelligence - but there are limits to how far outside the box you can go before you're just making up a solution because you're too lazy to think about what we can do with what we already have.

I'm not saying that we should take it compeletely seriously - the point is to have fun - but I'd like to see us try to think a bit more about solving puzzles ala an adventure game rather than just making up a silly story.

There needs to be some sort of direction (a short-term goal for example) and somebody directing us there. They need to have a reasonable solution involving the objects that we already have in our possession at that time. If one of the players comes up with another reasonable solution based on our current inventory, the current game master should be free to accept that solution etc. It doesn't have to be the same person all the time. And I don't think its unreasonable for several people to play the part of the game master at once, chipping in to post witty outcomes, but the guideline should be that game-master posts shouldn't let us off the hook or advance the story without a interesting, plausible solution (I hate to use that word) based on what we already know.

Edit: lest that seem a little restrictive, commands like "look at..." or "talk to ..." could reasonably reveal some new object or some new idea that could then be used to solve the current problem. But there should be some challenge in seeing how that object could be used in the current situation or in conjunction with other objects that we have. For example, its fine for us to "look" while stuck in the sheep monster cave and find a set of shears since that doesn't directly solve the problem of getting out of the cave. Its kind of silly for us to "look" and find an elevator tucked under one of the sheepmonster's coats.



[Edited by stigant at Local Time:04-21-2005 at 06:31 PM]

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04-21-2005 at 06:26 PM
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Abbyzzmal
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quote:
stigant wrote:
There needs to be some sort of direction (a short-term goal for example) and somebody directing us there. They need to have a reasonable solution involving the objects that we already have in our possession at that time.


This, I think, is the most important thing that Stigant pointed out of all the good things he said there. This game got to the point that I could not keep track of what we had or what was going on, and it seemed no one else could either, and so they (we) just added whatever they (we) felt like. Keeping this game coherent is the real challenge; it's like playing telephone, only more dynamic.

I propose no solution, but when it gets too crazy, I will type

>reset

and negate all the progress that has been made. How vicious! So please, keep it real, everyone. None of these Deus ex Machinas that are so popular with the kids these days, okay?
04-21-2005 at 08:41 PM
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trick
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quote:
> reset

You consider resetting the game. The two off-game posts above this one has some excellent points, so it seems like a good idea. It may be better to start a new thread for the new game, though.
04-21-2005 at 08:50 PM
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wackhead_uk
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Hacktually, a new thread Awaits.

[Edited by wackhead_uk at Local Time:04-21-2005 at 08:56 PM]
04-21-2005 at 08:56 PM
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