This is the voting topic for
DROD is Odd, our May contest.
As usual, rate the quality of each entry individually, and authors are allowed (indeed encouraged) to vote 10 for their own entries.
Entries are listed in a randomly selected order. If no title was provided, I used the first line (incipit) as the title, in long-standing poetic tradition.
#1 A Halph Haiku
Halph, Lesson the first:
Bump a door, he'll open it.
Required: Don't kill Halph.
#2 A Haiku
The basic, cute roach
Moves towards people, not with spite
But to give warm hugs.
#3 Vertical Preference
to the tune of "Waltzing Matilda"
Once a jolly roachling sauntered through a dungeon room,
When he encountered a wall in his way,
And he sang as he stood there, trying to make up his mind,
"
Which way shall I go round this wall today?"
Vertical preference, vertical preference,
North over east and south over west,
Oh, if you're a roachling trying to make up your mind,
Just let V.P. tell you which way is best!
Along came a Seep, and spoke out from within the wall,
"
Why are you pondering for so long today?
We both know what you'll decide, for you're such a boring creature,
And you always go in the same boring way!"
Up strode the Delver, Really Big Sword in his hand;
Along came his mimics, one two and three,
And that poor little roach knew he'd have to make his mind up fast,
Or else he Vonnifa's dinner would be.
East went the roach, and stepped straight onto a firetrap;
The moral of this story is now plain to see.
Oh, if you're a delver, it's bad to be predictable,
But if you're a roach, stick to good old V.P.!
#4 Spider
スパイダー
は隠されているが動い
ている
#5 Ortho squares
[Chorus]
Ortho squares, ortho squares, they
Don't allow to move diagonally and
Ortho squares, ortho squares, they're
Called
Ortho squares, ortho squares, 'cause they
Only allow to move orthogonally, those
Ortho squares, ortho squares, yes,
That's what they're called
[Verse 1]
A mesh of blue below you indicates there are certain paths you cannot take
The moves that change both _X and _Y are those you cannot make
Now cardinal directions are the only available actions
So watch out when the trapdoors are falling or you might just run out of connections!
And suddenly you'll have to care about things like parity
Or taxicab geometry, oh Jeebus, this is scarin' me!
But in the end I know that even without a maths degree
You'll master them with certainty if you just go and sing along with me:
[Chorus]
[Verse 2]
And brains, as stupid as they are, don't recognize the markings on the ground
So they don't even try to lead the roaches that they command around 'em
Leave 'em grounded in a state of perpetual motion
Like the waves upon the Ocean, going down and up and down and up and down!
What was that sound? Was it the sigh of a delver trying their best to pass by,
Like in a past life when they were the chain of a gentryii carelessly dragged behind?
Or a fegundo that is longing to explode but sticks around
Just pounding their head against a wall? Whatever, sing it with me now:
[Chorus]
#6 The Path Not Taken
Two paths diverged in a purple room
Since an obstacle blocked my path
And though one way spelled Beethro's doom
I went instead where hot tiles loom
And soon heard Beethro's laugh
Or through a field I would set forth
Where blue diamonds equally lay
And while this column has no worth
I wandered only south or north
There was no other way
No matter where I ever try
Westward once or eastward sence
Two paths diverge in a room, and I
I take the one dictated by
My vertical preference
#7 Where monsters live and scurry underfoot
Where monsters live and scurry underfoot
A delver goes to work without a word
And soon arrives to give them all the boot
Through cunning and a really big-size sword
Or with a staff a queen he gives a shove
With eyes arrested on his pocket watch
For giving her a timely forceful move
Forbids the roachling eggs a chance to hatch
A blob of tarstuff can be rather tough
With colours signifying to him how
A path can be eviscerated through
A shifting mass he can't allow to grow
When cleaning out a dungeon things that live
Cannot contractually be left alive
#8 Pit Images
There are some things in this plane and land
Few of them are awesome, fewer are grande
But there is one thing that keeps me up in the night
So rare and amazing, it's just quite a sight
(Chorus)
Pit Images
Pit Images
The best in this world
Pit Images
Pit Images
Just look and get whirled
Pit Images
Pit Images
So rare here they are
Pit Images
Pit Images
If you fall you'll get scar
I know you are thinking I am just a mad bard
But the truth is I am secretly a guard
I also work sometimes for the DAA
And I place pit images in less than a day
(Chorus)
With that being said I now have to go
My job has just called me, and as you might know
I have to place some pits in a day
And give them their images and avoid fray
(Chorus)
#9 "Clones are only targets if selected"
Clones are only targets if selected;
Timeclones are targets when unbrained.
Mimics are never targets, they're rejected;
Decoys are always targets if in range.
#10 The Unkillable Snake
Beethro goes down the stairs,
looks around, and then declares,
"
I can't kill that snake
without a good brake
to stop it in its square."
With no helpers around
Beethro turns aside and frowns
Spotting a clone potion
He considers the notion
but isn't sure how that sounds.
A helpful steel sword
could strike along in full accord
But that dastardly worm
has skin far too firm
to make any progress forward.
After some further review
Beethro looks over, head askew.
"
I'm not sure this'll fly,
But I'll give it a try,
'cause it's the only thing left to do."
With a well-timed swoop,
Beethro enters the coop.
He closes his eyes,
and to his surprise,
He finds himself out of the loop.
"
Hmm, I understand it -
It's just as I had planned it!"
By making the switch,
The snake stopped in a hitch,
For the butt it was gnawing was granite.
____________________________
50th Skywatcher
